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Journo Dotage
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August 31st 2003 15:00 CDT
On a speedy return
The plane home from Narita was a record-breaking 10 hours long. I had cleared immigration, collected my luggage and was heading home in a taxi before I was even due to get in to Minneapolis. Every once in a while, you have to get lucky.
Northwest Airlines have a bad rap for coach travel and it may be justified however their World Business Class is excellent. Today's flight attendant from Beijing to Narita was a class act; as we were descending into Narita, we hit some turbulence and the lady in question who was walking past my seat commented "He [the pilot] isn't very good at this. Just thought I'd mention that." with a mischevious grin on her face.
It's nice to get back to some sanity and roads that don't threaten to kill you at millisecond intervals, to be able to pull out a dollar bill without fearing being mugged and to not have to push people away from you who are so desperate for anything that they literally latch on to you. The poverty in Shenzhen is omnipresent. I didn't see a single house in all the time I was there. Accomodation for the natives appears to be ramshackle apartments or tin shacks.
I decided while traveling that I'm a very passionate observer. I'm not big on interaction, but I do enjoy just watching and absorbing.
Comedy food for the day: from the menu at Shenzhen airport, "Hot Dog of Intestines". Mmmm. I like a bit of truth in advertizing.
Sad moment of the day: it is 18 years to the day since my grandfather shuffled off his mortal coil.
Geekcentral out.
Comments ()August 31st 2003 05:55 GMT+8
On hard knocks
The girl who I thought I had cleverly outwitted in a bartering exercise for a taxi to the hotel ended up in handcuffs. All because she overinflated the price by $9. At first I was impervious but then felt sorry for her. She was just trying to be and earn a living, albeit in a fairly unethical way. But then again, I am sure she would have probably knifed me in the back in a heartbeat if she knew I had dollars in my pockets. It's easy to lose your humanity in these situations.
I'm on international dial-up at 9.6K so I'm out of here. The phone does not work with my AT&T card and there is no broadband. I am heading for the airport.
Comments ()August 30th 2003 12:30 GMT+8
On the end of my trip
So I'm wrapping up my time in Shenzhen. I have a myriad theories and suspiscions about life here, but you don't really experience it from a five-star hotel. There's an air of freedom, but even a superficial look under the covers hints at oppression. The head barman at the hotel I'm staying at makes $80 a month so what do the girls who just stand around all day in traditional Chinese silks make? They all live in dormitaries provided by the hotel and are bused in from out of town to work 12 hour shifts. It's hell, but what about those that don't have such high-profile jobs or the language skills to work in those jobs? It really is mind boggling.
While I have been here my language has been stunted. In order to be understood, I have started dropping superfluous words. It's an education. "Shall we go to KTV?" becomes "we go KTV?". The words "is" and "a" disappear from your world for a while because they only complicate the message. English is a bizarre language and one that I can claim no talent for. How the rest of the world learns the mad rules that dictate our language is beyond me.
My Chinese cheat-sheet has been updated. In addition to food, I now have numbers and a few other useful phrases.
In a funny sort of way, I quite like this place, hostile as it is. I'm afraid I haven't taken any pictures of the streets because, to be honest, pulling out a digital camera here would be asking for it and I stand out enough amongst the natives as it is. I'll see if I can't get some shots from the cab on the way to the airport.
In a couple of hours I check out of the hotel and have a few hours to kill. After that, it's a flight from here back to Beijing, a quick 10 hours in a hotel and then back to the good ol' US of A via Narita.
Anyway, I'm tired and hungover from the late night KTV for those of you familiar with such culture.
A final piece of advice for those who ever visit China: under no circumstances, even if you think you can take your alcohol, ever be duped into drinking Chinese wine. Wine is a misnomer. It's a spirit. It will love you and then kick you hard. Right in the gonads. Really, really hard. The Rickshaw Jasmine tea however, is a great cure.
Sieh siesh.
Comments ()August 28th 2003 07:05 GMT+8
On censorship
It's interesting that I can access my own blog from China but that MJ, Pam and the whole of the blogspot domain are not accessible. Maybe they're all a bunch of capitalist pigs? Or then again, maybe it's a bot thing. We'll probably never know.
I have but one thing to say on the culinary aspect of my stay. I like my food in a state where it is not moving. Bringing out live shrimp, soaking them in alcohol so they are stupified, then setting them on fire does not a meal make. And if I see another crispy fried duck bill or chicken head, I swear I will barf. At least at breakfast there are fried eggs and bacon. Oh, and char siu buns. Mmmm.
You can call me uncultured but I would say this is just a matter of taste. I fear I will lose another 10 lbs while I'm here which is something I probably cannot afford to do seeing I came back from the last trip 10 lbs lighter at a massively underweight 145 lbs.
Later kiddies, breakfast awaits and I'm bloody ravenous.
Comments ()August 26th 2003 14:40 GMT+8
On Beijing and Shenzhen
There is an industrial funk that smothers Beijing in the morning. Regimented trees and uniformed state workers all stand to attention and are barely visible. When the smog lifts a wonderful nation totally in harmony and at ease with itself is displayed. Seven AM sees hoards of men, women and children exercising outside their apartment buildings in a joint sense of being.
Bicycles pervade the streets and pedestrians need to be assertive and alert. Toll booths are strangely exotic with elaborate Eastern decorations that make them look more like shrines than tolls.
This is not the friendly feeling of Taiwan. It's a light oppression that gnaws at your consciousness. It's Big Brother and check-points. It's watching everyone all the time. I think what I'm in is an exotic state of vulnerable limbo, relying on the honesty of strangers.
And so I give you in three pictures the story of today. From Beijing, three hours of hell, to land in Shenzhen.
Gumba!
Comments ()August 26th 2003 01:00 GMT+8
On communism
Electrons dripping down a broadband connection. Least communist place I have ever been. Already been conned out of $20 because the taxi driver chose to take me to the wrong hotel. Beijing is bizarre although likable. More when I am not feeling like I'm about to die of exhaustion.
Sieh siesh.
Comments ()August 24th 2003 07:10 CDT
On breakfast
I believe this. The only thing I miss more than an evening in the pub is some decent bacon and sausage, lovingly fried in lard. With HP sauce. And runny eggs. Fried bread? Mmmmm. I'm off out to the grocery store.
Comments ()August 23rd 2003 12:15 CDT
On a plane, again
In 24 short hours, I will be on a plane again, back to Asia; specifically China. On my way over to Shenzhen and on my way back I have a night in Beijing. The same Beijing where tanks ran over students. The same China that restricts access to certain Western web sites that are a little too explicit in their descriptions of democracy.
Apparently Shenzhen is one of those places where you should never walk alone or take a taxi alone. The natives have a propensity for smashing Westerners over the head and relieving them of anything valuable. I have heard tales of Westerners being shot for the contents of their wallet. Nice.
Being a seasoned business traveller, I expect to be able to roll up to a hotel at midnight, drink a couple of G&Ts and then have a walk around to see the place. It sounds like my normal modus operandi will not be possible on this trip.
Anyway, if you don't hear from me for a couple of days, fret not. I leave tomorrow and actually arrive in Shenzhen on Tuesday morning local time. Be assured that if anyone bashes me on the head, they are most likely to be assaulted on a grand scale; the Yates head is legendary for its tolerance of impact.
Shayshay.
Comments ()August 20th 2003 22:05 CDT
On mystery and suspense
For the more literary-minded among you, you may be able to appreciate the words 'I feel a big change coming on'. In the literary case, it was shortly before one of the main character's death (a prize of my choosing will be bestowed on the first comment to cite the right book). In my case hopefully it isn't. I would love to elaborate more on the myriad dilemmas and potential changes that are currently looming on my horizon but I can't. It's too early to be vocal.
And before you ask, no I'm not giving up the day job to be a pro-golfer. Neither am I off to Hollywood to seek fame and fortune. Also Madonna has not asked me to elope with her again, (bugger off Madge). And finally, Natzoid is not young free and single again (unless I have some mail that I haven't opened). When the time is right, I'll let you all know. Until then, it's schtum from this alien.
Can you feel the suspense? No? Neither can I.
Comments ()August 19th 2003 18:05 CDT
On embarassment
I did something yesterday that I swore I would never do. I broke a personal pledge. I'm not proud and it certainly wasn't big, clever or funny. I'm not sure how I am going to live with myself for such a lack of self-discipline and the deep shame that I have brought to my family. Yes, you can drop your links to me for being such a shallow and pathetic waste of oxygen. I wouldn't blame you. What I did was unforgivable and it's a testament to Natzoid's patience that she is still here. I played golf. Worse still, I enjoyed it. Even worse still, I actually want to do it again. And the ultimate sin, I'm absolutely shite at it.
I know many of you won't forgive me for the lapse of judgement and succumbing to such a puerile pleasure of the flesh. Eighteen holes and two good shots to be noted. One of my team actually allocuted that the 175 yard drive up-hill would have been 200 yards on a level hole. And that putt that got us the birdie? That was all me. Two small personal victories out of eighteen holes and already I can feel the beckoning from the local golf club. I've deluded myself into thinking I can do better and have even had thoughts of buying clubs etc.
Does it matter a jot that I lost 5 balls on the first 5 holes? Does it dissuade me in any way that I managed to drive a ball at right angles? Does it trouble me that had we been playing conventional rules, I would have come in at 120 on a 72 course? No. I laid down and let it do what it wanted to me, begging me to come back for more no matter how much my ego and self-esteem were damaged by its relentless cruelty.
Hired clubs for $7.50 and an electric golf cart for $12 in 100 degree heat. It's so cheap, base and utterly immoral. I'm sorry. The last thing I need is another vice, but you see, vices are good. They draw you in and pounce. (OK, Miami Vice was not a vice in the true sense in that one could take it or leave it.)
It's OK if you never read this again. It's totally understandable if you never want to talk to me again. If you want to burn the house down, please just do me the favor of letting me know so the kids and dogs are not punished for my crimes. I plead guilty to it all and I would change, but I fear I have the addiction...the first one was (nearly) free and when I come back for more, I know they will eat me from the inside out.
Oh, and if you have some unwanted clubs, let me know.
I think I need to become a Catholic and head off down for some serious confession. Where was Mary when I needed her? Maybe Allah will strike me down. All I really know is that I am but a weak and lowly worm on the planet and I should have known better than to taste the fruit.
Comments ()August 17th 2003 13:00 CDT
On ecstasy
I'm in love. I had some serious camera envy while traveling in Asia as one of my cohorts had a 6 mega-pixel Fuji Finepix. I can't justify 6 mega-pixels for me, but I can justify 3.2. I love it. I love it. I love it.
Now all I need is an AC adapter, a case and 128Mb xD card and watch out China, you are about to be 'shot'. Oh, and it also doubles as a webcam. Did I mention I was in love?
Comments ()August 16th 2003 14:00 CDT
On a blurry Saturday
I've got a hundred things I've got to do, but due to the ridiculously late hour that we crashed last night, I imagine maybe one or two might get done. I mean we're talking life support here; if it ain't essential, it ain't happening. The problem with travel is that if you actively enjoy your spouse's company and you know you're only home for a matter of days, you tend to want to spend time with them rather than sleeping.
As you can probably tell from Natzoid's blog, we had a wild and drunkard night last night. You know it's bad when Bronski Beat and The Pogues join the party.
What started off as a mellow evening watching films (Gangs of New York, Phone Booth and whatever the Adam Sandler film is called) ended up being a riot of red wine, music and an awful lot of laughter. I've said it before and I'll say it again; you should all envy me. Who else in this world would laugh when I start singing falsetto at four o'clock in the morning?
PS - Someone remind me to get a limit order in on Monday morning because I, sure as hell, won't remember.
Comments ()August 14th 2003 18:50 CDT
On what I have not learned
According to "communications experts" only 7% of communication is words, 38% is intonation and a whopping 55% is body language. Really, is that so? OK smarty-pants, how come telephones and email are such a large part of corporate communication? And how on earth do you explain books? Told you, complete pile of sterile donkey jism.
Thankfully, there were a couple of redeeming moments where I actually went "ah!" and thought I had learned something only for them to be followed by some emotionally charged video of hurl-tastic sycophancy.
I'm all about the touchy-feely and I employ and surround myself with them. Not. I can deal with emotion, doubt and self-consciousness but not in the form of a motivational video or presentation that makes me literally want to scream, gag and then kill the perpetrators. Pseudo-emotion is worse than none at all and I'm sorry, but nobody has their shit so together that they are in a perpetual state of cosmic good karma. To delude oneself into that state is dishonesty at its most fundamental and crass level. And that flies in the face of all you teach.
Comments ()August 14th 2003 06:45 CDT
On firsts
My sleeping problems are well documented here and are frequently exagerated by time-zone changes. Since arriving home from Asia, they have become unbearable so last night, I broke Yates's Law Rule Number One which states "Thou shalt not ever take sleeping pills or dire prognostications will befall thee - specifically manifesting themselves as a propensity to over-sleeping on the grandest of scales".
So last night at 21:00, I popped two little blue fellas. By 21:15, I was starting to feel a bit drowsy and by 21:30, I was in bed snoring like a kitten doesn't. As expected, I awoke at about 02:00 this morning but actually went straight back to sleep, albeit a light slumber, until 06:00 this morning. The result is a bright and bushy Kenny, raring to get at the day. Unfortunately, I am going to a seminar today on "The seven habits of highly effective headless chickens" so my boundless energy may well be zapped by the time I get home. Still, I suppose there's tomorrow.
Another first, and I'm kicking myself on this one, is that I neglected to install the MS patches on my desktop at work and consequently got hit by Blaster. It's pretty easy to get rid of but I'm so disappointed in myself. This one is sneaky. It doesn't use email; it comes in on rpc ports and then uses DCOM to spread itself around...a worrying omen of what is to come methinks. Firewalls help but it only takes one infected laptop to be brought behind your firewall and blam, you're hit. Be wary! Update that OS with the patch for Windows. For a fix should you become infected (symptom is your computer suddenly rebooting and a process msblast running), visit Sophos. This paragraph has been a public service announcement.
Anyway, must off to learn about being effective. Cough.
Comments ()August 12th 2003 18:00 CDT
On being out of it
Too...damned...tired.
It's like morphine. The urge to sleep is swallowing me whole but I will fight it for at least a couple of hours.
Natzoid has been particularly surreal since I arrived home. Apparently the new defragmenter in XP is way cooler than the old one. Disk defragmenter and cool in the same sentence? What? And she seems to have asked Dr Conners to travel to Scotland and purchase some Jorgenson tartan prior to a trip over here. She is convinced that the pulled muscle in my leg is some bizarre instance of an STD when in reality, it is indeed a pulled muscle. I caught her playing in the "cave" which is her name for the space under my desk where the dogs usally lie. She told me last night that she was thinking about leaving me for another woman; the justification being "constant oral sex and double the wardrobe".
I really do hope that I never have to leave for two weeks again. I have some pretty unpleasant visions for what might greet me upon my return.
Comments ()August 12th 2003 00:00 CDT
On being home
I should know better than to leave for two weeks. I arrived home to find the kitchen redecorated. It's not that I object, just that it's changed again and I end up pouring water into the garbage can rather than the kettle. I am, if nothing else, a creature of habit.
As I arrived back in the US, my cell phone bleeped. It is testament to my widespread popularity and our extensive social life that the only message on my phone was from Natzoid wishing me a good trip just before I left. Sigh.
Anyway, it's nice to be home and to be greeted by the world's best wife and cheesiest son, even though he's at that 'dangerously mobile' point in his life. Now he can stand up, he needs a football, so that is my job for tomorrow.
Comments ()August 11th 2003 09:20 GMT+9
On a plane again
Thankfullly today's flight from Narita to Minneapolis will have an English guy on the top deck. Said Englishman willl probably be found demanding gin and tonic with menaces and absorbing the contents of the plane's wine cellar closet.
Spending 24 hours in a hotel in Japan without any currency is not something that I would recommend. Conversation at the bar is 'light' and there are only so many re-runs of the BBC news that one can tolerate in one day. Speaking of the BBC, why is it that BBC World can be accessed everywhere in the world other than America and we get the nauseating BBC America?
Next time I blog, it'll be back on good old CDT and not in freaky-deaky GMT+x.
Comments ()August 10th 2003 20:35 GMT+9
On reflections
I've had a couple of freaky moments while I've been in Asia. You could put them down to exhaustion but that would be a cop-out.
One was dozing in the back of a car in Korea and being conscious enough to listen but not pay attention. It's amazing how your brain can make words out of what is really random noise. The sentences don't make sense but the words are there. Conversations end abruptly because you don't know goodbye in that language. There's an aura of conspiracy and you never let down your guard, always ready to fight no matter how deep the sleep.
Another was in Thailand. For some reason, I felt compelled to call my grandmother. We talked for an hour or so and just as I was winding down the conversation, she asked me whether I had ever got over the death of my grandfather. I completely broke down, sobbing like a child. As soon as I had recovered I went to bed but had a sense of presence. Not a bad presence, but a guarding voyeur. I could feel the breath. It shook me but I knew all was OK.
I'm a techie with no religion so all of the various non-epiphanies that I experience really get to me. I know it's all imagination and alcohol but it registers so vividly that the adrenalin pumps around me.
You people don't want to know this. I need to get home..."stir crazy" is an understatement.
Comments ()August 10th 2003 14:05 GMT+9
On getting just a tad fatigued
I should be boarding a plane back to Minneapolis right about now but I'm not. The flight was overbooked so I'm holed up in the Hilton at Narita airport. Having rewired the room due to broadband difficulties, I now have about 24 hours to reflect on the last two weeks.
I have learned a lot. I know that Taiwan is not the scary place that I imagined it would be. I know I love Singapore. I know that Thailand has some beautiful places but it never feels right being there. I know that a karaoke night in Seoul can go on forever. I know our Korean rep, who we will call Mr P for the sake of anonymity, is a complete madman when it comes to the old Sujo(sp?). I know that I don't particularly like Korea. I still do not know how to tackle a whole chicken in soup with metal chopsticks.
I may not have mentioned this before but I have a passionate hatred of all things metal. Like other people don't like nails on chalkboards, I hate the smell, the feel and the sound of metal. I hate people who scrape their forks on their teeth and I hate people who rub coins together. So giving me metal chopsticks is like giving me a preview of the inner ring of hell. Did I mention that Korea was hell?
In the immortal words of Dave Gahan, people are people the world over. Some of us expect too much and some of us accept too little. Traveling around some of the places I have been to has shown me that no matter how bad life can be, you should always be appreciative of your circumstance because there sure as hell are people who have much harder lives.
I have also learned that there is a good reason that manufacturing moved to Asia. The truth is that they are good at it and they understand it. I have visited companies this week that astounded me with their total comprehension of what they were doing. American manufacturers never had that. When you buy something that says "made in Taiwan" or "made in Korea", you should interpret it as being a quality metric. The attention to detail and care that goes into making electronics in Asia is unbelievable. Henceforth, I have dropped my "buy American or British" mantra.
With a bit of luck, I should be home for 5 o'clock CDT tomorrow. Then follows 2 days of rest, some work and then I'm back out here to Shenzhen in China. I think I may well crank a beer and reflect rather than contemplate.
Comments ()August 7th 2003 20:55 GMT+9
On Seoul
If Korea is not hell, then it is on the doorstep of hell and its language is that of those in hell.
I have picked up some Chinese this week and can say "I do not understand" which vocally is "dimadong" and "thankyou" which is "shayshay" spoken very quickly. I also know the word for microprocessor but will not bore you with the details. I can now read a menu well enough to order a type of meat that is acceptable and I have a crib-sheet still in my pocket.
Korea though, I'm sorry to say, is quite the most inhospitable place on the planet, and you cannot fathom a word of its language. I do not intend leaving my hotel other than for work and for the airport. As we collected our bags at Itcheon, hoards of barking taxi-drivers tried to assault us to take their cab to the hotel in Doksan that we were to go. It's in a perpetual state of dawn with mist over beautiful hills and mountains yet in the luscious valleys between the hills, every mile or so is a massive complex of Bladerunner style multi-story apartment buildings that are so devoid of imagination or comfort that you can feel the passion drain from you. Literally 10 or so are sat like mini city skylines, breaking a landscape that was made for better things. I have taken some pictures but probably won't get to upload and deal with them until morning.
I don't want to talk too much about work but suffice to say that the methodology is all about the activity and productivity is secondary. You must work 18 hours, whether you're blog reading or producing something. Must work 18 hours!
Korea's only grace is that it has an airport that can get me the hell out of here and back to the civility of Japan.
PS - I have discovered the joys of wireless while I've been here so guess what I want when I get home?
Comments ()August 4th 2003 18:20 GMT+8
On Taiwan
Couple of observations on my current hosts:
August 4th 2003 08:30 GMT+8
On comedy and impending death
If anyone had told me yesterday (or even earlier today) that minutes after passing through security and passport control at Singapore airport, en-route to Taipei, I would be sat at the side of a pool having a gin and tonic and smoking a Dunhill, I would have told them that they were naive. Either that or smoking something that you could be executed for in some countries.
Anyway, it's true. At Singapore airport, in terminal one, you can clear passport control, meander up the stairs and have a cocktail at the side of the pool. Or maybe just hang out in the hot-tub with a monkey (I'm joking about the monkey). I shit you not though. Nothing is more hysterical than observing middle-aged Western businessmen on a deck chair at a bar with their laptops fired up, honing that presentation. I have photographic evidence but not yet.
Another thing. I'm writing this at 30,000ft on my way to Taipei. As we took off, the captain started the usual spiel. "Welcome aboard flight SQ30 to Taipei...blah, blah...flight time today is 4hrs and 10 mins...blah, blah...should be quite a nice flight until we get to Taipei where there is a typhoon in the vicinity."
Might as well have said, "by the way, the landing gear doesn't work but have a nice flight."
As someone once threatened, I do indeed live in interesting times.
Taipei until Wednesday and then over to Korea. If it still exists then. George W seemed a bit edgy when I saw him on CNN. Gulp.
By the way, I'm sat in one of those white robes in an Asian country where they have snakes and assassins and everything, feeling very James Bond. I think I'll call Q and have him send me over an umbrella with a concealed .45 and then think about killing a few villains before the cocktail hour.
Comments ()August 3rd 2003 11:00 GMT+8
On Singapore
Singapore is like Manchester. Except it has decent temperatures and you're not likely to be stabbed for winning a game of pool. The bars could be any pub in Manchester. Again, except they are situated on the riverfront.
I had a fairly easy day yesterday, only being responsible for getting my tired and sorry arse on a plane from Phuket to Singapore. For some reason what is alleged to be a 90 minute flight appears to take about 8 lifetimes (6 of them particularly long and hard and 2 that involve relatively early demises).
So to fill the rest of the day, my old ex-pat friend from the UK and I took to what we always used to do best; get a pint and talk rubbish for the evening. We visited an Irish pub at Boat Quay and drank a Guinness and then went down to what must have been an Aussie pub where they had the biggest screen TV I have ever seen showing the Australia vs South Africa rugby game and Stella Artois on tap.
Mid-evening, we were summoned to meet our sales guy for the region at a Japanese restaurant and moet wassabe was consumed, along with the obligatory Sake.
We finished off the evening playing pool at the Ice House where I relieved a few people of some drinks having played some surprisingly good pool given the foreign rules. The sales guy wanted to start playing some cards but I had had enough and headed back to the hotel to call Natzoid.
The one worrying thing here is that this hotel rate includes a massage. I have been avoiding it because it all seems a little seedy to me. Maybe that says more about me than them but I don't know. Anyway, they hound you about this massage from the moment you check in to the moment you leave. This morning, I was awoken by a call from somebody in the massage center demanding to know what time I would be there. I also have a flashing message that I know will be from them. It just isn't right.
So if you don't hear from me until I get to Taiwan, it's because I'm the dude in the lobby with the moustache and mullet haircut, hanging out not being me at all for fear of some 300lb she-man wanting to crack my ribs. It is like Manchester, a lot .
Comments ()August 1st 2003 04:50 GMT+7
On why I married Natzoid
ay: Here - I've just downloaded the fruit picture...
natalie: Oh FUCK!
ay: What?
natalie: I would NOT even accept that plate. Get it out of your room man, it's a Thai Tribble
ay: Jesus you had me worried there
natalie: What the fuck IS that thing?
ay: Random fruit.
natalie: That's not right, seriously. There's NO fruit, even in Thailand that looks like that.
natalie: Don't touch it...is it pissed off that you took its picture?
ay: I haven't asked it
natalie: Well, if it were pissed I guess you'd know.
natalie: If I were you, I'd call the front desk and be all "Hey, why don't you come up here and shave my Tribbles?"
Now tell me you don't envy my every waking second.
Comments ()August 1st 2003 07:45 GMT+7
On eating abroad
Being English, my taste for spicy food is non-existent. If it doesn't taste a like a cow or a potato, it probably isn't a foodstuff in my world. So imagine the surprise when I got to Thailand and was appalled that even the soup was designed to fuse things at room temperature.
With the exception of some Sushi somewhere, I have extracted my daily calories from gin and tonic, and the occasional totally unrecognisable fruit. I'm pleased to report my usually dodgy stomach has suffered no side effects from this however my brain is starting to rebel.
In this hotel, at random intervals, room service arrive with even more random fruit. And then they arrive to close your blinds. I'm English - I do not expect or even handle good service. I keep half expecting them to sneak in at night to switch off the TV when I've fallen asleep, hook up my PC and pull down my email for me or break in 10 minutes before I awake to make coffee for me.
Seriously though, I don't know how the Thai people became so placid and pleasant but hell, we could do with an awful lot more of that in the world. I wonder whether I'll be saying the same things about Taiwan and Korea?
Speaking of Korea, our rep there is a story in himself but I can't tell it. Talk about a character...
And another thing, I held a fecking monkey. Cute fella, about 2 foot high and the softest fur imaginable. Natzoid and I need to come back here on holiday.
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